Most of us have heard about that annoying Elf on the Shelf tradition that started a few years back, so I won’t go into detail. If you haven’t heard about it, Google it. Or, count your blessings and walk away.
Well, I, striving to be the perfect mommy, was sucked in immediately. The weird elf was purchased, I read the story to the kids, and a huge deal was made of naming her, Noel, by the way.
Next began an elaborate show of moving the elf each night during the Christmas season and creating magic for my kids. Ahhhh… what a good mommy. No, what a dumb mommy!
Flash forward a couple years later and mommy now despises the elf. Every night, I am required to come up with some magical freaking idea. Problem was, I set the bar too high in the beginning.
Second problem, I often forget about the elf because this girl is tired at night. In the morning, my disappointed kids would give me that accusing look and ask, “Why didn’t Noel move?”
What I wanted to say was, “Noel drank too much last night.” What I actually said was, “I don’t know sweetie, maybe someone touched her.”
So, it was Thanksgiving weekend 2014, I was trying to find the stinking elf and she was no where to be found. It was already December 3rd and the kids were demanding her arrival.
I finally found her tucked in some obscure place, and knew I had to come up with a good excuse for her tardiness. Thus, Noel The Inappropriate Elf On The Shelf was born.
Now, I know Noel’s response to the innocent children was completely inappropriate. My husband did not approve of this, and he informed me I am going to hell. My response to him, “Shotgun!”
It was a silly joke, meant to relieve some of mommy’s holiday stress. The inappropriateness was supposed to be a one time occurrence. The kids laughed, dad half-laughed, and I laughed. Holiday magic instilled! What happened next, is a whole other inappropriate story.